the indian
this happen 3-18-07 in the pm

i slept restless last night,didnt go to bed till about 11:30PM

was back up around 1am ...drank some milk for my dry throat and smoked a cigarette before going back to bed.

remember tossing and turning...once as i turn over toward the east window, which also is toward the door of the bedroom, i saw the man......this didnt scare or surprise me this time......if you remember i saw one the morning after imbolic.

this time i looked a bit more closely...saw his face was of an indian....older man....maybe a few years more than me......i remember thinking about wheither he was real or not, a illusion of the curtian..... he just stood there facing the window ....looking out into the yard.......want to think he had a blanket wrapped around him.

i turn back over facing hubby......i toss and turn three times each time i faced this window he was there........remember thinking i wanted to make sure he was really there........i also remember thinking i needed to speak to him...to find out who he was....why he was here......i think i tried, but dont remember if he answered..........i know i saw him standing there the three times.

then later i dreamt of wheather or not i did see him......my mind trying to believe he was there or not??? or maybe we did have that conversation and that cuase the restless dream.???

then on my way to work this moring[monday] as i was just about to the mill......a wolf or coyote ran full speed across the road in front of me......i didnt even have time to even think of about slowing down for him before he was across the road and gone...........funny thing is.........i was thinking of seeing the indian at the time i saw the wolf.......i wonder if the wolf was a sign that i did see the indian?????

i am thinking it was a wolf..because of his size bigger than a coyote and the way his fur was not like a dog....wolf popped into my mind first thing...i asked my manager at work if we had wolves in this area and he told we some a few so it is possible i saw one.

a side note~
told my sister about this and she told me that
our grandmother told her we are desenteds of a shaman line , and i think cherkoee.
she also thinks that since he was facing the east,that this is a direction we should look to moving in,[we need to move] which after some thought i wonder since we are to visit bob's family soon if it isnt a sign to find somthing around them.
i also thought that the east is the direction of new beginnings also the wolf helps you find your life path[thanks to a friend here who told me of it] so would this mean we/i are getting a new beggining to our/my life path

 heard the voice again on sunday morning,the 29 of april. whispering soft and low my nickname bernie,hubby was home on computer,letting me sleep.

 

 remember a few blogs ago i mentioned a voice in my dream

well i heard it again this morning

as before it calmly said my name and this time it sounded like my boss from work

dont recall my dream before  the voice spoke,but i do remember thinking it came from our bedroom doorway

i remember thinking "hey that sounded like my boss"

i laid in bed a while longer in a restless sleep

noone was home at the time but me and the dogs.

and i forgot to engage it in a conversation,oh well i am sure i will hear it again and i shall try to remember to do that, so i will updated you all when it does happen

one thing different about today than the other times iheard the voice, today is our son's birthday. 

i know this isnt much of a low down on the dream but it is what i can remember.

let's see i remmeber...

it was a autumn fair,samhian, day of the dead type atomostphere

booths everywhere, in a maze like set-up.

there was laughing, singing, all around good time had by all.

i dont remember anyone being with me as i wander the fair, so i was alone.

i do remember seeing a forture tellers booth and remember looking in it ,finding it empty.

i remember having conscious thought as i wander looking at all the different booths, meaning i remember how it felt like it was real and i tought and talked to myself as i went throught the dream, as i would in real life.

now hawks are everywhere-lol

ok now for the details-lol

i think it was tuesday i saw two hawks at different times.... once at work while sitting at my window, he landed on the posts that support our loading chutes.looking at the front spray field for food, then flew to a light pole not far away but a bit closer to the field. then on the way home from work that same day, i saw one sitting on a post next to the road, he looked straight at me as i past slowly to take in his beauty

this is what i found on hawks and their messages 

  Hawk Symbolism

In representation to humanity, the hawk is called messenger, protector and visionary. Keen vision is one of it's greatest gifts. Hawks see things others miss.

The hawk comes to you indicating that you are now awakening to your soul purpose, your reason for being here. It can teach you how to fly high while keeping yourself connected to the ground.

As you rise to a higher level, your psychic energies are awakening and the hawk can help you to keep those senses in balance. It's message for you is to be open to hope and new ideas, to extend the vision of your life.

The Hawk is an animal of flight. It soars through the air looking down, and sees everything. It has a larger perspective of what is going on down below. With it's keen eyesight, it looks down as it soars through the air looking for its pray. It can see the smallest of creatures below.

The Hawk is known as a messenger, similar to the planet Mercury. For the hawk soars close to the Grandfather Sun, as does the planet. When you listen to the power of the Grandfather Sun or Wise Spirit that lives within, you are protected from all types of harm.

The Hawk teaches you to be observant and take a close look at your soundings. It soars with the power to overcome difficult situations. It soars in circles over the life of the earth, asking you to circle over your life and view it from a higher perspective.

The Hawk has a distinct cry, one that most people are aware of. Its cry signifies awareness. For one to be aware, or beware of your surroundings. If you hear the cry of the hawk use your intuitive ability to discern the message and seek the truth.

If a hawk has soared into your life, you require a higher perspective. You need to see the details of what is going on and look at the bigger picture. Take a look at your situation from above.
aSkyeWolfe Magickal Pages

oh...a question.....

i have also notice last week as i traveled home on I-40 a bird that had been hit by a car ,not be sure, but i know it is either a owl or a hawk, judging by its coloring and size. is this a gift from the universe? should i stop and take a few feathers? i am left gifts all the time at home just the other day a wasp's nest was at our back door,brought it in and put it with the other one i have. and i had a very strange feather on my night stand under the alarm clock too big to be one from our pillows ,that one did confuse me,well i should say is confusing me-lol

 

 

here's some blogs i osted elsewheres thought i catch them up here

will up dated them as the time to comes might divide them later into their own blogs

 

 this past monday morning [12th] i was on my way to work got near a bridge near our house and saw this bird flying straight at me ..now mind you it is 5 am and still very dark.. so i know there are not many birds flying this time of the morning, and i saw as he got closer he was big, a hawk was the first bird i thought of ...but no, not a hawk ,too early for even him...... it was a owl and he landed on a sign near this bridge

on my way home this same day i come to this same bridge and i see this brown thing on the ground looked about 2 to 3 foot tall thought at first it might be a log standing up ..as i got closer it moved its head and looked at me and the car it was of course my owl just sitting there on the ground waiting .....

huge beautiful bird.....i wonder if it was the same owl i saw a few months back in our yard swopping down on some prey.........could be

 

Monday, February 05, 2007

ok i am not sure but i think i saw another dryad today

these were more in the tree branches than the trunk as the one yesterday. did a quick search on dryad's today but didnt find much ......just they are tree spirits -female-and can have their own tree to watch over or a forest of trees but even then she has one tre she calls her own

then if the tree should perish then she will perish

will do some more checking later

4:15 PM -


Sunday, February 04, 2007

sunday
Current mood: contemplative

i woke this morning as the alarm clock blared

to seeing a person?,thing? a creature? not qutie sure what he was,and yeah i got the feeling it was a he..........the strangest part is where he was.........standing next to my window [that faces east] but he wasnt on the floor he was about 3to 4feet in the air [we got 10ft ceilings] and he was bending down toward the clock, like he was going to turn it off.....as i reached for the clock and realizing that he was there i saw him stand straight up and disapper...or fade into nothingness by then i was fully awake and know i didnt see him anymore.

my dreams the night before were many and i was restless sleeping. i cant seem to remember the dreams at all or even a idea of what they were about

then this morning as i was at work, it was about 8 or 9 am i took a few minutes to smoke a cigarette as i waited for the next cup to process. i looked out the window a robin came down close to the window , i said hi to him and asked him if we had good food for him around the farm for i see him often lately. he sat there a second or two then flew off. then i looked at the line of pines that are between our farm and I-40 as i do most times when i sit there smoking. and i saw a dryad in the trees -plain as day- i thank her for allowingme tosee her and tears wheld up in my eyes for the honor that was betow to me to see this beautiful creature. and as i finish thanking her she faded away before my eyes and all i could see were the trees.

oh and one more bit of thought here....the voice....well maynot be the voice for i was fully awake and at work when i heard a 'pssst' no one was around for i was alone in the lab, there were no machinery going at the time....might be the voice or something else i dont know

9:19 AM -



Sunday, January 07, 2007

the voice
Current mood: confused

i will be posting more of the voice when i hear it

today i heard the voice , or what i call the voice

i heard it about a year or so ago in my dream ,always in a dream, the first time it said ''wake up you fat bitch''

then the next three times i have heard it it just saids my name. in different tones the second and third times it was in a urgent tone. this the forth time it was kinder more gentle as if someone was waking me.

there isnt someone in the house every time and when there is i ask if they called me and the answer is aways no.

i have been told it could be a guardian and for me to turn and find this spirit the next time it happens. i can only hope i remember to do this when it does happen again. which i was also told it maybe my selfconscience talking to me.

the voice is different from the dreams i am having at the time . totally apart from the dream. and the voice seems fimilar to me. i just cant seem to place where i know it from. it doesnt frighten me. but it did pissed me off the first time with the fat bitch remark-lol

the second and third times with the urgency i felt as if something may be wrong somewhere- but when i woke all was well. and the forth time today it was as if it was genltly waking me, very sweet and loving.

if it is me talking to me, and the first time with the meanest in the voice ,where i wasnt accepting of my self, could it be that now i am more accepting of myself? and thats why the more gentle additude?thus is the reason i know the voice. but then if it is a gaurdian ,which some believe are part of our soul groups and they are trying their best to tell me something, and thus the reason i know the voice , a voice of a trusted friend of my soul group.

as i said in the beginning i will post more on this as it happens to keep a record of sorts about it.

10:37 AM - 



sunday, December 24, 2006

a search and find puzzle

Pagan pages posted a search and find for the kids today

I looked it over ,as i was bored, well not so bored as over -tired today. anyways looking at this puzzle it remined me of a thought i had a while back. First ,let me say i love these types of puzzles. I have done them a-many of times over my long years, even made a few when in school. So now you know i have done a -plenty of them. Well last year I was doing some,fairly easy ones in a book, Soon i was zipping through these in this book . See I found the pattern to them, the ones in this book. All of a sudden this thought came to my head

Life is alot like these puzzles.

funny isnt it, or dont you see the connection?

ok look at it this way

There is the puzzle sitting there in front of you . At first your eye doesn't see any words. Then bang!! you see a word or two. Bang again you see three or four words,soon you are flying through this puzzle . Then all of a sudden you are stumped with finding the last two or three words. Ever slowly you find the last words and finish the puzzle, or maybe you give up and dont find them and go to the next puzzle, sometimes, one can't help but to cheat and look in the back of the book to find those last few words cause you hated to leave anything undone.

so ...you still with me here?

Here is your life all laid out in front of you. you dont see which way to go, then Bang you see a few ways to contuine . Then a few more, you take these paths . soon you are rolling along with your life cause you can clearly see where you need to go . Then bang a stand still ,cause you reach those few last words. What the fuck you think. it cant be this hard every thing is sitting right there in front of me. all the answers to everything. Then you start to look harder more deeply , even nick-pick at the puzzle that had been so easy before. Searching every letter, searching every path...looking that one letter that will produce a word you know... looking for that one path that will produce that way for you to go.

Sometimes its harder than we think ,or are we making it harder? Anyways we cheat a bit and sneak a glance at the answers in the back of the book.....we sneak a look into tarot or other divintion methods looking for the answers.

Then sometimes ...some take the easy way out and go to the next puzzle...sometimes some may take the easy way out and go to the next life??.....

Look at this whole book of puzzles as our many lives past and future ....each puzzle a life time .....Soon one can see a pattern to all the puzzles in this book and as we go through each puzzle we seem to be catching on to the pattern and zipping through each puzzle....as with our many lives we learn from our past lives and bring that knowledge into this life.....

its all right there in front of us.....................

we just can't seem to see it........ as of yet........

I'll tell you what though ....the search and find puzzles, its much easlier to find their patterns-lol

Well did i totally lose you all on that one-lol